First it was Oprah Winfrey gloating about her weight loss several years ago on her television show.
Next came Kirstie Alley showing off her svelte figure after she dropped significant weight.
They were both followed by Valerie Bertinelli who pranced around in a bikini after she lost weight.
But the last straw? I was glancing through some magazines not too long ago when I came across a recent edition of People with whom on the cover? You guessed it Melissa Joan Hart in a bikini. Melissa Joan who? My sentiment exactly.
Excluding the three people in the Melissa Joan Hart fan club, please allow me to inform the masses who don’t have a clue who Melissa Joan Hart is. She is n or was - Sabrina the Teenage Witch. And why is she on the cover of People magazine? Because she shares a common bond with Oprah, Valerie and Kirstie.
All are part of an exclusive club of former chubby celebrities who lost a great deal of weight. Good for them. They deserve to be proud of their accomplishment. But they also insisted on making their weight loss a very public proclamation.
Not a good idea for Oprah or Alley, who gained a significant amount of the weight back. Their roller coaster battle with weight garnered comparable public interest. So far Bertinelli and Hart have been able to maintain n and they want to make sure the entire nation sees their success.
I don’t diminish the discipline it takes for a lifestyle change to lose weight. But I do take issue with the fact that some celebrities insist on gloating. People magazine devoted significant photo spreads of Bertinelli and Hart prancing around in bikinis. Bertinelli, like Alley, was a spokesperson for Jenny Craig.
But come clean, Valerie. Losing weight is much easier if a personal trainer and free Jenny Craig meals are part of the deal. Just wondering, Val. I’m not sure what weight loss program Hart followed. But give us a break. Celebrate your accomplishment in private. Prance in your bikini around your own pool.
Maybe Bertinelli wanted to make her ex-husband, Eddie VanHalen, jealous. Who knows? Maybe Hart is hoping to be cast in a sequel, Sabrina the Bikini Clad Witch. Hard to tell.
Why not give equal time to male celebrities? I read somewhere that Saturday Night Live alum Horatio Sanz lost a significant amount of weight. We did not see him parade around in a Speedo as part of some marketing campaign.
America does not deal with obesity well. It is common knowledge that Americans eat too much junk food and we get too little exercise. We need fewer celebrities who market diet food companies and more who encourage healthy lifestyles starting at an early age.
One nightmare that haunts me is Jenny Craig is searching for its next female spokesperson. Someone who would be a real challenge. Someone who would shock the nation in a bikini.
If I’m right on this, I hope People gives its readers ample warning if a leaner Rosanne Barr appears on the cover in a teeny weenie polka dot bikini. If there is a leaner Barr on the horizon somewhere, just remember one simple rule. Modesty can be visually appealing.
Bob Kliebenstein is a Tomah resident.

